101 jots – (xci – ci)

(xci)

Have another boob job,
botox your lips again,
have a nose job
and shlop a ton of muck on your puss.

Now you look pretty.

We like you,
you make us a pile of money.

(xcii)

I’m the portly entity they have to impress,
commoners labouring in the kitchen
preparing and presenting their signature creations.
I love to see them tremble, waiting for my verdict.
I give most dishes the thumbs down…after i’ve eaten.

It’s good to be the king.

(xciii)

History is kind to those who write it.

(xciv)

We know where Tom sits with book and coffee,
we have our eye on him.

Tom reads books he doesn’t have to,
history books we didn’t write.
Tom is a threat.

(xcv)

BREAKING NEWS

Singapore family survives without maid for 24 hours.

(xcvi)

Lucky i was there when ma fell off the ladder
and broke her leg, i was able to record and upload.
‘Call an ambulance,’ she said.
‘First things first,’ i said.

(xcvii)

Depression is a word too depressing to use
so now we call it recession.

(xcviii)

I’m happy with little, my wealth never runs out.

(xcix)

The English football team –
brilliant on paper, shit on grass.

Arthur Smith

(c)

In a direct message Miranda tells me
she has a cure for erectile dysfunction.
It sounds so simple i’d have to be hard up to believe her.

(ci)

James Baldwin wrote:
The world is white no longer, and it will never be white again.

The Western party is over
and the white man’s sun has set. Period.

*****************************************

32 thoughts on “101 jots – (xci – ci)

  1. Wonderful finds, John. Numbers 93 and 94 are so true – I always ask older children to question Richard the third’s Shakespearian appearance. 96 is a real sign of the times, and 99, well, you’ve got to love Arthur Smith!

  2. Love these jots, especially “History is kind to those who write it” and, John, who wouldn’t love the Miranda jot? Thanks for making me smile.

  3. A delightful smorgasbord! I can relate to “I have very little. My wealth never runs out.”
    I own less now than most of my adult life, but when I am feeling down I write a grateful list and it amazes me how wealthy I am…..though not in owning things. The wealth I have now doesn’t run out or rust or spoil. Who would have thunk? ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. Fun, insightful, witty, John. i liked the quote History is always kind… Reminded me of a discussion I had with a MicMac Elder once. We were talking about the history of Native Americans and he had to remind me that everything I THOUGHT I knew was written by the white man.

  5. Hi, John. I don’t know whether you will get this but if you do all the best for the season and the new year. Perhaps, one day, you will return to your blog – I always enjoyed reading your stimulating writing. Anyway, all the best to you. Chris.

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